funny po-em-things...

All material ©Copyright 2005 by D X Stone

"Some pretty weird and goofy shit here. If you're going to read these, I'd advise you to wear a condom... it couldn't hurt, anyway."

 --Former Surgeon General C. Everett Koop


 

Goofy Poems On Eyeballs n' Such

Potato Bugs (Mr. Potatohead's Lament)
God is Big
Whether
Bad Bunnies (and other assorted shorties)
Not a Paranoid
Divining Rod
Silly Disguises
Carloan Blues
Bad Aspirin
Someday
 
 

 

For The Thinking Weirdo

Jesus Hangin' at the Mission
Bunji's Fingers
It Sometimes Makes Me Wonder
Whatta Lotta Laughs
The Nurse Won't Answer My Buzzer
In The Night Museum
The Puppet in the Pulpit
Naked Nun
Braunstein
Your Govt Inaction
 
 

 

Dark Matter

Hell I & II
Everybody's Waiting
Listen
Marla's Alarms
Shootin' Your Mouth Off - Ode to Ariel Sharon
Post-Nuclear Primer
Another Pound of Flesh
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

   

 

 

 

 

 

Braunstein

 

When the sky is sinking low

And you don't know the way to go

To reach your home

When your eyes decrease in size

And you can't see a way to be

Alive alone

When the sun has come undone

And there is no one to make fun

Of anything

When the moon is in it's fullest lunacy

Remember me--remember too

The prayer I sing

 

Can you not see?

Fall on your knees

Pray to Braunstein

He'll make you clean

Fall on your knees

Pray to Braunstein

 

When moneyed monkeys make

The major bankers quake and shake

In spasmelodic glee

When gnarled gnomes are seen to

Freely roam the bent and broken homes

Of you and me

When weeping widows keep their windows

Closed and no one knows if they're

Alive or dead

When scarlet children barter shiny

Cylinders of silver for the

Dead man's head

 

Can you not see?

Fall on your knees

Pray to Braunstein

He'll make you clean

Fall on your knees

Pray to Braunstein

 

Now you're thinking that your life

Is total frustration

You've got too little time

Too much information

And you watch and you wait for

A new revolution

What can you do to penetrate

The illusion?

 

Throw up your arms and dance!

Surrender to ecstasy

There may be no second chance

You're all alone with your fear

Don't waste your breath to scream

No one but you can hear

There's only so much we can share

Each to his own design

Each has his cross to bear

You'll learn eventually

Whatever will be will be

Whatever will be will be will be will be...

 

Can you not see?

Fall on your knees

Pray to Braunstein

He'll make you clean

Fall on your knees

Pray to Braunstein


All Evil Toons, All The Time!

President Evil Online Home

 

Intro to Evil Incarnate 101

  The Lovely Dick Cheney Page

  Four More Beers, Quick!

  ScaryWorld

  Stoopidity for Dummies

Our Leaders Are Chucky-Dolls
Bob Dylan Public Service Message

 

 
 

 Meet the REAL Fockers!

  Revenge of the Living Rummy

 The Halliburton Horror

President Pinhead

  More Stoopider Even

Obscenity of the Week

Flying Crazee Clown Faces!!!

 


Other Neat & Scary Stuff

Millions are Horrified!!!

 

The Scary News

The Bipolar Bowler

  More Funny Poem-Things

 Pig-Mittens!!!

 

 Michael Jackson Has 17 Assholes!

     
 

 Evil Alien Clone EXPOSE! 

 

 The Surreal News

 

 The OJ Simpson Defense Rap

 

 Who The Hell Am I, Anyway? 

 Does This Look Like a Bigfoot To You?

   Anne Coulter Alien Anal Probing Scandal!

Hail, Well-Met Fellow Inmates!

 

Twilight Eyes: Dark Visions by Swamp Rat

 

IMPEACH HIM! by hiley

 

 Class Warfare: A Photo-Essay by BlueBear

 

A Planet Full of Hitlers by Octafish

 

 NEVER FORGET: animations by hyakamooks


Contact me at dxs@presidentevilonline.com

All material on this site is ©Copyright 2005 by Daniel Xavier Stone. All rights reserved.
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